Learning to Trust

Another Shoulder Surgery??

Hi there! I know it’s been quite awhile since I’ve posted a blog, but there was a major change in my life recently. My plan for this year was to come back for the fall season, be in the best shape of my life, and have my shoulder be stronger than ever.

Then a wave hit me. Literally.

I was in Newport Beach, California with my family and was briefly splashing around in the ocean. The waves got bigger, I got a little stuck in the tide, I ducked under a big wave, and it took me and slammed me to the ocean floor while underwater. I knew instantly that my left shoulder was out of its socket. Long story short, after many hours and excruciating pain they popped it back into place at the hospital and the reality of a dislocated shoulder and what that means for this season set in. 

I had several doctor’s appointments, X-Rays, an MRI and found out that my labrum is torn and I have a dent in the bone in my shoulder. I have to get surgery and the recovery will be at least 6 months long, probably longer. Are you kidding me?? I have to go through the exact same thing as last year again with my other shoulder??

If I’m being honest, I have not been dealing with this very well. The thought of going through another surgery and long recovery is daunting, and it feels like all the gains I’ve made this past year are slipping away from me.

I don’t know what this year will look like, I don’t know when I’ll be healed (both shoulders), and I don’t know how long it will take me to get back to professional volleyball shape. What I do know and what I’m leaning on is that this obviously happened for a reason. I don’t know what that reason could possibly be, but I’m holding onto hope that it happened for a good reason and I am exactly where I’m supposed to be. 

I’ve been spending a lot of time reflecting, grieving the loss of this 2021 comeback season, and thinking about how I can make the most of this time. I’ve decided that I have 2 options- to either sit around and sulk, be jealous of everyone who gets to play, and be sad; or I can get back up, trust that I’m here for a reason, and do my best to make the most of it. 

This period of time is really testing me to practice what I preach and see if I can actually shine on through whatever life gives me. I’m not going to lie to you and say that I like what life has recently thrown me or that it's easy to stay positive, but I do have a choice to get up each day and do my best to make the most of it. Some days I may lie in bed a little longer, have a good cry, or say “WHY ME?” But, I’m still choosing to get back up and move forward, even if it’s only a millimeter forward. I’m learning how to trust that I’m meant to be here.

So, to make the most of it, I will be doubling down on Shine On Volley and really working to grow my brand and make good, useful content for all volleyball players and fans out there. I’ve been having some fun on TikTok so come hang out with me. And I’ll also be back on Insta posting more consistent content on there again. Keep shining on my friends and I’m looking forward to this journey of healing together.

Love and light always,

Sarah 

Enjoy this photo of me at the hospital after they popped poor lefty back into place. I was SO SANDY! I asked my mom to redo my ocean wave hair but when you touched it a pile of sand fell out 😂